opinion, Sports

NFL’s Worst Team This Season is So Bad That They’d Do Better If They We’re Actively Trying To Lose

“Forget just losing at home, they’re losing 42-10,”–the big cuck Joe Buck.

As I write this, the Arizona Cardinals (1-5) are losing to the Denver Broncos (2-4) by a whopping 42-10. And if you didnt know this already, the Denver Broncos are sort of a monstrosity this season, which makes how badly the Cardinals lost make them look that much worse. Case Keenum, who has sucked for 15 years of his career barring his one good season last year, is back to the old Case Keenum.

Coming into this game, the Broncos have been the worst NFL team at defending the run. The Broncos gave up 593 rushing yards in the last two games. It was comparable to rushing against the Broncos defense on Madden, with the difficulty setting dialed to Rookie. For Good-dell Sake, the Broncos made the Jets look like a playoff caliber team after losing 34-16.

We’ve known that the Cardinals have been struggling, but many we’re expecting to see them bounce back just a little by utilizing their elite running back, David Johnson. Nope. The Arizona Atrocity only has 64 rushing yards in total, 14 of which came from a Josh Rosen scramble. David Johnson has 14 carries for 39 yards…a woeful 2.8 yards per carry. Rosen as thrown 3 interceptions, and fumbled twice. Every single turnover stemming from the Cardinals Cardinal-Player…Josh Rosen.

Seriously, it felt like every other drive ended with an INT or the ball was on the ground. The Broncos would just take the ball and suddenly be like a b-string offense; it seemed like every quarter there was a takeaway with the Broncos defense on a fast break to the end zone.

I honestly think this team is worse than the Browns were in their winless season last year. Think about how bad a team has to be to lose by 35 points to a notoriously bad team that is dealing with all sorts of inner strife and complications. Not only that, Von Miller made them look absolutely stupid. Every so often, an athlete emerges that can both talk the talk and walk the walk. They are the ones that boast about how badly they’ll beat someone. They look like a cocky asshole and a douchebag…until they beat the people as badly as they said they would.

Muhammad Ali fans loved him because he’d boast about how easy it’d be to win…and then he’d get in the ring and make beating his opponent look like a breeze. Conor Mcgregor earned the loyalty of millions of fans because he’d dominate his opponents in and out of the ring. Those that watch Mcgregor promotions and weigh ins can usually expect a verbal slaughtering to occur.

“He said why you talking shit?”

“Or What? You gonna do something over there? Shut yo fookin Mouth.”

I am not even the biggest Mcgregor fan. He’s the guy I pull for in UFC of course, but that’s because his story line is a lot of what keeps UFC relevant. People wouldn’t care nearly as much if the Notorious wasn’t stirring things up for the sport. Trash talking, and backing it up, can literally affect the entire sport:

I mean, not only did Mcgregor make Alvarez look bad, he made himself look like the Michael Jordan of his sport. I mean, with that win, McGregor was the first ever UFC fighter to hold two championship belts in two different weight classes. The fact that he changed weight classes to fight Alvarez and made beating Alvarez look easy reaffirmed his complete dominance over the sport.

That’s what happened here tonight. Von Miller of the Broncos has been the story around the NFL this week as he threw a little shade at their Arizonian opponents. To clarify, Specifically chose the word “shade” since Arizona is notoriously sunny, dry, and hot. At least my pen pal thinks I am funny. We always joke about how his handwriting reminds me of my Dad’s.

When Von Miller was asked if the game Arizona was a “must-win,” the Vonster from your nightmares replied that Denver was, “gonna kick (the Cardinals) ass.” And that is exactly what they did…especially on defense. Screenshot (66).png

Considering Von Miller is the captain of the defense, he really needed his boys to smack the Cardinals and fulfill his promise. Five forced turnovers in a 45-10 win? I wouldn’t classify that as kicking their ass, I’d classify that as swinging a Round-house at their butt holes.

Just like every good trash talker ever, the Cardinals looked abysmal, and the Broncos looked fierce. Before this week, everyone wrote off the Broncos with the expectation that another shitty year is coming their way. After bending over Arizona, Troy Aikman and Joe Buck had a conversation about them making the playoffs. Quite a turn around in reputation from another losing season to playoff bound.

But you have to ask yourself, are the Broncos really that good? Or are the Cardinals just that bad? I’d argue the Cardinals are that bad. They’re led by a cocky rookie that buckles under any type of pocket pressure and is clearly not ready to be a starting quarterback. Rose was once considered the clear top quarterback coming out of the draft–a quarterback good enough to publicly reject Cleveland from drafting him. Who’da thunk that he’d be playing the worst behind Baker Mayfield, Josh Allen, and Sam Darnold?

Oh yeah, I did.

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