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Male Celebrities that absolutely didn’t get their start in Porn….

These celebrities did not get their start in porn. And you’ll believe it. Because you’ll take one look at them and think, “Yeah, no one would ever watch that person do porn.”

Marylin Manson

Marilyn Manson: all-American nightmare | Dazed
Marilyn Manson hints towards a new album with obscure Instagram post

Even without makeup….yikes:

Carrot Top

I’ve seen the devil and am going to church on Sunday.

DJ Qualls from Roadtrip

The Big Bang Theory" The Loobenfeld Decay (TV Episode 2008) - IMDb

This guy is someone who has some serious self-awareness and made a career out of it being a character actor. He knows he’s ugly and decided to use it to his advantage as the weird guy in comedy movies. I salute him.

Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson 'Momo-style' video tells people a figure will enter their  room and scream 'Hee hee' | Daily Mail Online

Kidding. But that actually kind of looks like him:

Michael Jackson Would Have Been 53 Today | Showbiz411

I mean thank god for his voice because his career path might have gone wildly different.

Imagine if Michael Jackson wasn’t super famous and his skin changed like this? I would do anything to see him try to tell people he was black. Can’t imagine the type of beating he’d catch if he said the n-word in front of other back people.

Speaking of people whose skin’s changed….

Sammy Sosa

What the fuck happened?

Sammy Sosa claims that he’s not trying to be lighter and not doing what Michael Jackson did and it’s not because of a skin disease….it’s apparently because he has been using this cream for ears that makes his skin after but he thinks it’s been having a side effect….that and the lights they shine on you when you appear o TV makes you look lighter.

Ok.

Randy Quaid

That’s real nice Clark.

Steve Buscemi

Steve Buscemi and More Join Judd Apatow Comedy - VitalThrills.com

Just want to say that I respect the hell out of Steve Buscemi. Buscemi was a volunteer fireman from 1980 to 1984. When we were attacked on 9/11, Buscemi was already an established actor and had starring roles in Fargo and Con-Air and stuff like that. Still, decided to go back to his old firehouse and volunteer to help. The rest of that week, he worked 12 hour shift and searched for missing fireman in the rubble. The man is a patriot.

That said, I don’t see him winning many sexiest man of the year competitions.

Steven Tyler

First time I ever saw Steven Tyler was on American Idol and I instantly thought he was the uglies tperson I’ve ever seen. Great singer and very unique voice….Dream On is one of the most legendary songs of all time. Steven Tyler’s face also happens to be one of the most legendary faces of all time…not legendary for good reasons though.

Wallace Shawn/ Clint Howard

Combing these two because they’re both supporting character actors that always pay nerdy little fellows. Both very lovable, both very ugly:

Wallace Shawn (is his name backwards? Shouldn’t is be Shawn Wallace?)

Clint Howard:

Clint Howard aka “That guy from Austin Powers” or “That guy from the Water-boy”

Mcaley Caulkin

Macaulay Culkin Gets a Pedicure From Paris Jackson | Time
Macaulay Culkin Slams Tabloids Over Heroin Use Reports
Macaulay Culkin's spiral from child star to drug addict after divorcing  parents - Mirror Online
Macaulay Culkin looks much healthier after drug fears last year - Irish  Mirror Online

Looks like his parents left him Home Alone too many times….

Mick Jagger

First time I’ve ever seen The Rolling Stones front man, I was watching Family Guy and they made a joke about the song Dancing in the Street’s music video:

And I couldn’t help but wonder who the fuck the guy in the green shirt was and why was he making all of those bizarre faces.

I was shocked to find out he was the lead singer of The Rolling Stones. That guy sings Paint it Black? You can’t always get what you want? Him?

Danny Devito

Ladies, you’re with your man and this sexy beast gives you this look. What do you do?

The only answer is ditch your man.

Roast me

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